Parents not letting me cycle

[10speedsemiracer]

...Whats out of control ?

We're dealing with a 13yo. We've provided some suggestions, but for the most part have advised he should negotiate with his parents, which is the right thing to tell a 13yo. We don't know the kid or his parents and we definitely don't know the whole context as none of us were in the room. I think this thread is done...

[NASHIE]

...Whats out of control ?

We're dealing with a 13yo. We've provided some suggestions, but for the most part have advised he should negotiate with his parents, which is the right thing to tell a 13yo. We don't know the kid or his parents and we definitely don't know the whole context as none of us were in the room. I think this thread is done...

Mate i fully agree, and most have offered reasonable solutions. So yes it does seem as far as the pysun goes its done and dusted. Only other advice is doing a few extra chores around the house to negotiate a visit to the local bike club with parents for just a look at what goes on and hope they like what they see. Try and find a mate to ride with on the M7 if bordom is the issue with this ride. Ask to ride the road bike to school and do a few extra blocks on the way home . Get a job delivering the local newspaper. Son did this for about 2 yrs as 13/14 yr old. Crap pay but good for bike skills.

[g-boaf]

pyson is indicating he wants to do cycling as a sport or thats my take. So that leads to wanting to race which means training to get to the pointy end.

Sorry... What the!? There was no mention of clubs, racing or training rides until such things were brought up by others.

Nor are such things necessary for cycling as a sport.

Clubs in this context provide a way for someone to be involved with cycling in a controlled environment that will hopefully calm down nervous parents.

We’ve all provided advice and none of it has achieved anything. Those parents obviously don’t want their son to ride a bike much at all, so there is little more any of us can do. Maybe we are even intruding where we shouldn’t.

I think this topic is done too.

[pysun]

...Whats out of control ?

We're dealing with a 13yo. We've provided some suggestions, but for the most part have advised he should negotiate with his parents, which is the right thing to tell a 13yo. We don't know the kid or his parents and we definitely don't know the whole context as none of us were in the room. I think this thread is done...

Yep, this thread is done. Two people arguing over a 13 year old's riding ability in moderate traffic on arterial roads(obviously, training in moderate traffic) isn't really related to my original post.

[human909]

Yep, this thread is done. Two people arguing over a 13 year old's riding ability in moderate traffic on arterial roads(obviously, training in moderate traffic) isn't really related to my original post.

Well I'm glad somebody has the maturity here!

Good luck with your efforts to ride as much as you wish. Stay safe!

[mikesbytes]

[Mod] Please keep to the topic which is helping the pysun with his desire to ride when his parents say elsewise

Please use the following thread for the generic debate

http://bicycles.net.au/forums/viewtopic ... 3&t=100046

[JPB]

Can you safely and easisly get to the M7 by yourself pysun or do you need your parents to transport you there?
As a parent of 3 I know that allowing a child to undertake an activity also depends on how it fits the family calendar.

[Mububban]

Yep, this thread is done. Two people arguing over a 13 year old's riding ability in moderate traffic on arterial roads(obviously, training in moderate traffic) isn't really related to my original post.

Mate, I get it. The asian parent “cotton wool” effect is very real. Frustrating, but it’s done from love….but still frustrating! I’ve got a Chinese mum and an Aussie dad, and even just one asian parent was a very “cotton wool” experience I still rode bikes and climbed trees etc, but she hated it and struggled to “let go”. Now she hates it when her grandkids climb trees and jump off things etc. Some things never change

Just wondering, is there any level of compromise that YOU would be willing to accept for a year or two? Which is a long time I know, but what about setting up an indoor Zwift setup? Save up your money (get a job, do chores, whatever) and set up an indoor virtual cycling setup. I know won’t be a patch on being out in the real world, but you’ll get fit and strong, still get to compete against other real humans, and stay safe.

Could you accept something like this, or would you rather not cycle at all if you're not allowed to ride as you want to ride?

And forgive me, I don't know the M7 as it's interstate. Do you have any bike paths that are away from traffic, eg parallel to the train line? In Perth you can ride about 80km on bike paths and never touch a road with cars on it.

[Bunged Knee]

And forgive me, I don't know the M7 as it's interstate. Do you have any bike paths that are away from traffic, eg parallel to the train line? In Perth you can ride about 80km on bike paths and never touch a road with cars on it.

No, it's not parallel to train line but only past one rail station at Rooty Hill. M7 got nearly 40km one way.
More info in Westlink M7 shared path.

[g-boaf]

Can you safely and easisly get to the M7 by yourself pysun or do you need your parents to transport you there?
As a parent of 3 I know that allowing a child to undertake an activity also depends on how it fits the family calendar.

That’s where clubs come in handy, always likely to be groups riding, be it the seniors or some of the parents riding their with the kids for a few hours. In the places where road riding is needed, the parents are there. All the parents share the same concerns.

Yep, this thread is done. Two people arguing over a 13 year old's riding ability in moderate traffic on arterial roads(obviously, training in moderate traffic) isn't really related to my original post.

Mate, I get it. The asian parent “cotton wool” effect is very real. Frustrating, but it’s done from love….but still frustrating! I’ve got a Chinese mum and an Aussie dad, and even just one asian parent was a very “cotton wool” experience I still rode bikes and climbed trees etc, but she hated it and struggled to “let go”. Now she hates it when her grandkids climb trees and jump off things etc. Some things never change

Just wondering, is there any level of compromise that YOU would be willing to accept for a year or two? Which is a long time I know, but what about setting up an indoor Zwift setup? Save up your money (get a job, do chores, whatever) and set up an indoor virtual cycling setup. I know won’t be a patch on being out in the real world, but you’ll get fit and strong, still get to compete against other real humans, and stay safe.

Could you accept something like this, or would you rather not cycle at all if you're not allowed to ride as you want to ride?

And forgive me, I don't know the M7 as it's interstate. Do you have any bike paths that are away from traffic, eg parallel to the train line? In Perth you can ride about 80km on bike paths and never touch a road with cars on it.

M7 is almost 39km end to end, non stop. You can branch off it to other paths as well, particularly down to the farm near Fairfield where there are some decent short sharp hills.

[pysun]

Can you safely and easisly get to the M7 by yourself pysun or do you need your parents to transport you there?
As a parent of 3 I know that allowing a child to undertake an activity also depends on how it fits the family calendar.

No(hence once every two weeks, we live in Epping), and that's basically the key problem. But I think I have successfully persuaded my parents to talk about their concerns with the people at the club via email and hopefully they'll let me ride(I guess).

[g-boaf]

Can you safely and easisly get to the M7 by yourself pysun or do you need your parents to transport you there?
As a parent of 3 I know that allowing a child to undertake an activity also depends on how it fits the family calendar.

No(hence once every two weeks, we live in Epping), and that's basically the key problem. But I think I have successfully persuaded my parents to talk about their concerns with the people at the club via email and hopefully they'll let me ride(I guess).

Ah, good. That's positive.

[human909]

Here is another potential positive for parents who might think that cycling is a distraction from 'more worthy pursuits'.

Teenager Gigante scores shock cycling win
Fresh from earning an ATAR of 99.95, this teenager has just won the national road championships.

[NASHIE]

Here is another potential positive for parents who might think that cycling is a distraction from 'more worthy pursuits'.

Teenager Gigante scores shock cycling win
Fresh from earning an ATAR of 99.95, this teenager has just won the national road championships.

Yes thats a massive effort on all counts. Another article when the ATAR come out was she broke both arms in a bike crash mid year, so had her mum transcribing for her.

[g-boaf]

Can you safely and easisly get to the M7 by yourself pysun or do you need your parents to transport you there?
As a parent of 3 I know that allowing a child to undertake an activity also depends on how it fits the family calendar.

No(hence once every two weeks, we live in Epping), and that's basically the key problem. But I think I have successfully persuaded my parents to talk about their concerns with the people at the club via email and hopefully they'll let me ride(I guess).

Ah, good. That's positive.

From Epping one possibility might be train to Guildford then cycle way through to Prospect, Horsley Drive and on to the M7. That still takes a lot of time though.

[pysun]

How great! My parents have just made it very clear that I must make "compromises"(aka. not letting me ride on roads with the lowest traffic). Man, asian parents!

[brumby33]

Yeah I know how you must feel but Epping is a very busy suburb and I can understand their apprehension on not allowing you to ride on public roads.
They fear losing you to an accident and once lost...you'll never be replaced. That is a fear of most parents, not just Asian Parents. My Parents are both Caucasian Australians and they were strict on me when I was your age, I had a bike, living up in Newcastle city which could be quite busy with traffic too back then but not as bad as now, they posted strict restrictions on how far away from home I was allowed to ride....I broke those boundaries a few times and my Dad dismantled my bike and hid the parts so I couldn't put them back together....he was a tough nut, I hated him at times when he grounded me, but as I grew older, I understood.

You may feel it's kinda tough right now but as you grow and mature, and maybe not until you have kids of your own, will you understand how they are acting.

It's ok for most of the guys here, we have been around the block for a while and some here are even grandparents, things were a bit better back 40 or so years ago, people weren't so pent up with anger and self entitlement back then...but today when one hears of hit and runs, drunk or drugged out drivers or those who just hate cyclists on 'THEIR" roads....then you'll understand your parents apprehension.
The most important thing for your parents is that you get a good education, study hard and get good career and have your own family and give them grandkids one day....they fear that may not happen if you ride on Sydney roads.


But even if you think sometimes that it's the end of the road, in most cases....everything is up for negotiation.....learn that art and things will happen.

Cheers

brumby33

[pysun]

Yeah I know how you must feel but Epping is a very busy suburb and I can understand their apprehension on not allowing you to ride on public roads.
They fear losing you to an accident and once lost...you'll never be replaced. That is a fear of most parents, not just Asian Parents. My Parents are both Caucasian Australians and they were strict on me when I was your age, I had a bike, living up in Newcastle city which could be quite busy with traffic too back then but not as bad as now, they posted strict restrictions on how far away from home I was allowed to ride....I broke those boundaries a few times and my Dad dismantled my bike and hid the parts so I couldn't put them back together....he was a tough nut, I hated him at times when he grounded me, but as I grew older, I understood.

You may feel it's kinda tough right now but as you grow and mature, and maybe not until you have kids of your own, will you understand how they are acting.

It's ok for most of the guys here, we have been around the block for a while and some here are even grandparents, things were a bit better back 40 or so years ago, people weren't so pent up with anger and self entitlement back then...but today when one hears of hit and runs, drunk or drugged out drivers or those who just hate cyclists on 'THEIR" roads....then you'll understand your parents apprehension.
The most important thing for your parents is that you get a good education, study hard and get good career and have your own family and give them grandkids one day....they fear that may not happen if you ride on Sydney roads.


But even if you think sometimes that it's the end of the road, in most cases....everything is up for negotiation.....learn that art and things will happen.

Cheers

brumby33

Thanks.

[NhiTrac]

Just a thought, how easy is it for you to get onto the bike track running parallel to Epping Road?

If you could get there quite easily you can stay on it all the way to Cammeray-ish.

Probably still a good 10ish km each way. Do that a couple times.

[pysun]

Just a thought, how easy is it for you to get onto the bike track running parallel to Epping Road?

If you could get there quite easily you can stay on it all the way to Cammeray-ish.

Probably still a good 10ish km each way. Do that a couple times.

Impossible without going through local streets or the M2, my parents deem any road with motor vehicle access dangerous and haven't let me ride that bike on any road without physically seperated cycle tracks.

Rather strangely though, they do seem ok with me disappearing from home and riding to libraries, parks and etc. through town centres, roundabouts and multi-lane traffic lights junctions alone on my old unmaintained Bigw Diamondback bike.

BTW, my Chinese family moved to Australia about 3 years ago and, the Chinese cycling infrastructure is comparable to europe, where you have 3m physically seperated cycleways each way on most main roads and painted cycle lanes for minor roads.

[mikesbytes]

I've did a short bike ride in Wuhan last year, have to agree about the differences between China and Australia.

What part of China are you from? I'm wondering if there are any Sydney based Chinese riders who are from your province

[pysun]

I've did a short bike ride in Wuhan last year, have to agree about the differences between China and Australia.

What part of China are you from? I'm wondering if there are any Sydney based Chinese riders who are from your province

Huh , doesn't seem like a bad idea, I'm from Shanghai by the way.

My Dad had just taken me to Parramatta Park after work for a short 15 km ride, it seems that I might be able to reassure their worries and convince them by the end of this month if he keeps taking me for rides like this. Anyways, the situation is getting better.

[Mububban]

My Dad had just taken me to Parramatta Park after work for a short 15 km ride, it seems that I might be able to reassure their worries and convince them by the end of this month if he keeps taking me for rides like this. Anyways, the situation is getting better.

Great to hear that they are slowly letting you ride some more. Think of it as a long term plan, which is hard when you want to ride right now! Stay cool, calm and collected, ease their minds, and hopefully you'll get to do a lot more of what you love in 2019

[pysun]

No go... They're saying that riding a drop bar road bike is more dangerous than riding a flat bar commuter, somehow. Even though my school is on North Rocks Rd (Carlingford High School) and I cycle there & back daily with moderate traffic and narrow lanes on my old commuter/low quality mtb and yet, they don't seemed to be bothered at all. LOGIC

[warthog1]

I can sympathize with any parents not wishing their children to cycle on the roads.
I dont forbid my 17 and 18 year olds from cycling.
I sure don't encourage it though.
10s of thousands of km of road cycling has left me with the recollection of multiple close calls.
My parental fear well and truly overcomes my cycling advocacy.